Knowing without Knowing
8/15/06
by Diane Sprague
I have come to the conclusion that people are idiots. Now I mainly draw this insight from a lifetime of observing myself, but now and then I like to observe others too. When I see how ridiculous others are, I feel less lonely. I especially enjoy watching people's behavior on the Internet. We are especially weird when we are invisible. We like to pretend, tell lies, and then tell some more lies in case the first ones didn't stick. What is especially amusing is the things we know. Except that we don't, but we won't let that stop us. We are bound and determined to know it anyways. Not only do we know it, but we also feel compelled to the share our knowledge without supplying any thing of substance to demonstrate its validity. Facts are unnecessary burdens we can toss aside. All we have to do is assert our knowledge, and voila, it's true, except that it isn't. Likely nobody will notice because they are too busy spinning their own lies. The only problem is when what one knows contradicts what someone else knows and that's when the nasty insults come in handy. Whoever comes up with the cruelest comeback wins. Except that they don't, but likely no one will notice that either.
I have been continually amazed about what we “know” about Clay. He is some kind of projection magnet and so many of us have thrown our fantasies, desires, fears, love, and hatred upon him. When we project, we are mainly unconscious about what we are doing, so we forget we are only seeing what we want to see. We stop remembering that we don't know. But it's cool. It can make for a fun fantasy, but it is bizarre to see how many people are sure they know. If one pays attention, the negative projections tells us a lot about the fears, insecurities, and ignorance hidden inside of so many of us. And perhaps the positive projections tell us about what we wish for in a world seems intent on giving us something different. Well, anyways, I like my projections but there is always a little sadness in realized I truly don't know. Sometimes I wish I could hide in the certainty that others often seem to hold, but then again if I did that I might miss the funny observations ones makes when one finally lets the sense of certainty go.
I started reading “reviews” of the upcoming album. Opinions are being strongly stated. Assessments are being made. Criticisms are being offered. Except there is one little problem. Nobody has heard it yet! But that doesn't stop us. Nope, we just forge ahead because we know. We know without knowing.
Now as a Clay fan, of course, I have made my prejudgment too, but I am not going to say that I know. I just suspect very strongly that it is likely to be fantastic. I have heard the snippets. I know it's not enough, so I could be dead wrong. Somehow I prefer it this way...not knowing...waiting to be surprised, to get what I expected, or to be disappointed. Life stops being tied up in a neat little package of what I think should be and just comes. It's a bit better this way.
Of course with what little I have heard, I would love to write about my reaction to Clay's voice during Without You except I don't have the right type of adjectives. I remember reading once that people who use words like glorious, breathtaking, divine, etc. should be shot. Now I am not exactly sure who would shoot me, but I am not taking my chances. I try to stay away from those words, but the adjectives that are left don't work that well. Saying that his voice is good, nice, exemplary doesn't cut it. So instead, I just put my headphones on and play the song for the Nth time and realize not everything needs words. Sometimes we don't need to know. We don't need to explain.
SirLinksalot: Clay Aiken Links
SirLinksalot: American Idol Links